Collide Magazine

Seven More Twitterers You Meet In the Twitterverse

Scott McClellan - Originally posted Tuesday, June 9, 2009 -

(Note: If you haven’t read the first article in this series, start there.)

I had so much fun observing and describing seven types of Twitterers in “The Seven Twitterers You Meet In the Twitterverse” that I just had to tackle seven more. Plus, I got some great suggestions from commenters on this post at the COLLIDE blog, so I already had a head start.

Before you read on, please remember that it’s OK if one or more of these categories describes you. Tweet however you see fit and do it to your heart’s content, and we’ll do the same.

Live Tweeters
It’s fun to watch a TV show or attend a conference, but reading someone’s tweets every two minutes while they have fun watching a TV show or attending a conference? Not so much. The fact is, if people really wanted to know each and every detail of an episode of American Idol or 24 as it happened, they would probably, like, watch the show. Or if someone wanted to go to a conference but they couldn’t make it, following conference tweets wouldn’t adequately capture the live experience. (Otherwise, the conference industry would be in trouble.) When it comes to TV, Live Tweeters also readily run the risk of spoiling episodes for those who are DVR-ing or who live in a different time zone. Why not wait until an episode or event is over and then compose a thoughtful blog post of your reactions and analysis? Heck, you could even live-tweet as you type out your blog.

Sample tweets:

“Waiting for the first session to start at #coolconference!”

“No way! Jack Bauer just pulled off his prosthetic face and revealed that he’s actually Magnum, P.I.! #24 #selleck”

Two-Parters
As you know, Twitter limits your tweets to 140 characters. But that’s just not enough for Two-Parters—they’ve got more to say. When Two-Parters run out of real estate in an individual tweet, they simply hit “Send” and carryover their thoughts to another tweet. And another, if necessary. And maybe another.

Of course, this doesn’t violate Twitter’s Terms of Service or anything, but it’s not exactly in keeping with the spirit of Twitter’s 140-character, micro-blog culture. Again, we’re apt to suggest turning those tweets into a blog post, which Two-Parters could then link to in a single tweet. But then, they wouldn’t be Two-Parters, would they?

Sample tweets:

“P1: Did you see the specs on the new iPhone 3GS? That thing is gonna be so hawt! Yeah, it bugs me that the camera is only 3 megapixels, but”

“P2: that's the only thing that bugs me. Either way, it's soooo much better than the G1 or the Pre it's not even funny! LOL! Maybe I should”

“P3: go ahead and get in line! OK, that's all I have to say about that for now!”

Blog Feeders
Speaking of tweeting a link to your latest blog post, that’s what Blog Feeders are all about. No, seriously, that’s all they’re about. Blog Feeders are bloggers who set up a Twitter account but never actually tweet any original content. Instead, they just setup their accounts to tweet automatically when they publish a new blog post. That’s all well and good, but most Twitterers will find that Blog Feeders don’t really get Twitter and therefore don’t contribute much to the conversation. Besides that, Twitterers who already subscribe to a Blog Feeder’s blog RSS feed will only find their tweets redundant.

Sample tweet:

“NEW BLOG POST: I Heart NY!: So I just got back from a week in NYC and it was great! There’s so much to say I... [shortened URL]”

Oversharers
Nobody likes an in-person overshare. Sometimes it’s gross, sometimes it’s just awkward, but it’s always regrettable. At least with an in-person overshare you can walk away and do your best to forget what you just heard (or said). Via Twitter, an overshare is visual, extremely public, and forever emblazoned on the unforgiving wall of Internet (unless you manage to quickly delete your tweet).

For some reason, Oversharers feel comfortable broadcasting tidbits (or worse, TwitPics) related to their bathroom experiences, bodily fluids, or love lives. You might feel momentarily embarrassed on behalf of an Oversharer, but save your real pity for the victims (Twictims?) of their guerilla oversharing tactics: their followers. Also, don’t hesitate to send an Oversharer a 3-character reply or direct message: TMI.

Sample tweet:

[REDACTED—because hey, a fake overshare tweet has the potential to be just as bad as a real one.]

Rocky Soilers
In the Parable of the Sower, Jesus describes some people as having hearts like rocky soil. When they hear the word (the seed) they’re joyful for a little while, but they don’t last because because they don’t have roots. The same goes for some Twitter users, albeit with infinitely less eternal significance (obviously). Rocky Soilers sign up for Twitter for one reason or another, follow their favorite celebs and politicians, tweet a time or two, and then just fade away. (In fact, Slate just documented this phenomenon in an article called “Orphaned Tweets” and points out that the same pattern previously emerged in the blogosphere.) Don’t fret over Rocky Soilers though. They gave it a whirl and it wasn’t for them. On second thought, if a Rocky Soiler is sitting idly on a Twitter handle you wish you could use for yourself, feel free to hate on them a little.

Sample tweets:

“Hello World! Just set up Twitter (because Dave has been hounding me about it) and looking for some cool peeps to follow!”

“This is a test tweet from my BlackBerry Pearl...”

FAIL Proclaimers
Throughout the history of humanity, we’ve raced—the Romans raced chariots, prospectors raced to find gold in the California hills, and the US and the Soviet Union raced to outer space. On Twitter, FAIL Proclaimers seem to be in a race to put a FAIL stamp on anything and everything at the first sign of trouble. While it can be great fun to publicly mock the mistakes, misdeeds, and shortcomings of inanimate objects, faceless corporations, and fellow humans, there is a downside. FAIL Proclaimers are prone to fits of negativity, impatience, and premature judgment, none of which are particularly edifying for their legions of followers.

Sample tweets:

“espn.com is down. FAIL!”

“OK ... seems like others can get espn to load. Must be my sorry DSL connection! #attFAIL”

“Just got off the phone with tech support ... looks like my CAT-5 cable is the culprit. Epic FAIL, cable!”

Accidental Tweeters
I confess to you that I really like Accidental Tweeters. Why? Because they inadvertently reveal pieces of private conversations to me. Accidental Tweeters mean to send a private text message to a spouse or a direct message to a friend when they accidentally post a tweet. I’ve seen some good ones in my day, and I’m sure you have, too. Check out the story of the Utah Attorney General whose accidental tweet tipped off the media about his plans to run for the Senate ... classic! Remember, kids, don’t get in such a hurry to text someone that you accidentally tweet your secret political plans or your Social Security number.

Sample tweets:

“U here yet? I just parked.”

“Sorry about what I said earlier. Your mother isn’t an evil dragon lady.”

Well, thanks for checking out more Twitterers with me. I know I didn’t cover everyone, so what other types of Twitterers have you observed? Maybe I’ll get to them in a future installment.

Scott McClellan is the Editor of COLLIDE. Follow us on Twitter: @CollideMagazine. Twitter bird icon available from The Design Superhero.